Much of the discussion centered on the pros and cons of creating work under pseudonyms. It seemed the general consensus was that people would like to not have two identities, but the reality of getting fired from one’s “real job” was far to great to risk. Pamela Madsen shared her story about getting fired from her job once her blog was revealed. She has since merged her identities, produced a book under her real name about her journey, sexual and otherwise, and gave it to her new employer essentially saying, “Read this and fire me if you want. I don’t want this coming out later.” She has remained employed.

It is stories like Ms. Madsen’s that can inspire more to come out. Much can be gained by sex bloggers creating work under their real name. Then the fill in the blank phrase about marginalization could be, “I have a friend who is a: sex blogger, sex worker, in an open marriage, into kink, etc.” With any movement, visibility breeds change. I applaud those who are able to come out from the pseudonym and merge identities and those who never even took up an alias in the first place. As for me, I like having two identities.

Listeners of my podcast might be surprised to know that I am actually a private person. Often I am asked why I would write and record about my sex life. Starting I Want Your Sex just seemed like a natural progression for me. Like most sex positive people, I was the friend that people turned to for relationship and sex advice. I accompanied many to sex shops to buy their first toy. Being open and honest is who I am. And I have strict separation about mixing the personal and professional.

In a work environment, I am not the one talking about all the sordid details of my weekend. For a long time many people I worked with did not even know I was in a relationship. I just don’t bring my personal life to work. If I got drunk, had a fight, or great sex with my partner, you are not going to hear me talking about it at the water cooler. Because I like the separation, it made sense that I would create a podcast under another name. Call me crazy, but it is preferable to me that those I work with do not know how I like to get fucked. Obvious concerns about safety were an issue too. But also having a nomdeplume is cool.

As a kid, I thought it was the coolest thing ever that the author of Silas Marner was a woman and George Elliot was a pseudonym. Granted the fact that George Elliot and, more recently, J.K. Rowling write under masculine or disguised feminine names is more of a comment on how our culture sees gender, but still I like the use of a pen name.

I didn’t remember my middle school desire to have an alias until a year into producing content as Mia. “Well, there you have it,” I said to my thirteen-year-old self with a big grin. “You got your wish.”

In honor of National Coming Out Day, I acknowledge that I do not feel closeted by my pen name. All those close to me know of my smut writing and I even told my previous employer about the ‘cast. I am open with my family about all aspects of my life including my non-monogamous relationship. They celebrate my struggles and victories and they are proud that I call myself a writer because they are writers as well. One day I hope to share some of my work with them. But for now I like to keep the separation with the knowledge that they can’t Google my alias and discover the dirty secrets that I make public.

For now, I will keep two names because I like it. Whether under a pseudonym or not, I will always speak honestly and openly about sex. I started the podcast because I wanted to give people a window into the sex party world and I hoped to inspire others to be sexually open and exploratory, whatever that means for them. I aim to continue doing just that.

This week kicks off a new reading series I am doing with fellow smut writers, Sadie Smythe, Rosie Q, and Julie Gillis.

I feel very fortunate to have connected with these ladies so quickly after my move to Austin. We are pioneering the untapped Austin erotica market. I see this venture as a new experiment and opportunity to forge new beginnings and to create an environment that will spark discussion about sexuality. I hope all those attending will be entertained, aroused, and ready to come back the following month. Aside from the four of us reading, entertainment will be provided by the Dumb Bondage Clowns. See our website for more details.

If you are in the Austin area, please come by. Otherwise, just help to spread the BedPost Confessions word.

Details:
When — Thursday September 9th and continuing on every 2nd Thursday of the month.
Where — The United States Art Authority (ext to the Spider House), 2906 Fruth Street Austin, TX 78705
Time — 8-10pm
Cost — Free!

Our website here.
Facebook page here.

Freedom of Fetish Episode 14.0

This and other fun items can be purchased from www.adamandeve.com.

Enter “miaontop” at checkout and receive a 50% discount on most any item.

This installment of the Debbie series revolves around a rag tag group at spring break camp. Debbie (Sunrise Adams) is the cheerleading captain from the poor side of town and her spoiled rich teammates like to give her a hard time, be her best friend, and order her around. It’s all very confusing, just like in high school.

The interludes are long with some campy acting and pretty unfortunate fashion styling. The ladies cheer in rather conservative uniforms and the hot little bod of Sunrise Adams gets covered up in sweat suits five times her size. The baggy duds don’t stay on for long, of course, but still the sexy wearing-my-boyfriend’s-clothes is taken to an unsexy extreme in this skin flick.

Some highlights from the interludes are “The Man Show” inspired with naked jumping jacks, jogging without bras, and many rounds of spin the bottle.

The smut scenes are masturbation heavy, which is fitting for the camp backdrop. The sex is rather tame, but honest. Sunrise Adams eats a pussy like she actually enjoys the trip downtown. And female domination can be read into the not one, but two, scenes of a woman sitting on a man’s face.

Female empowerment can also be found in the opening scene when a woman gives a show for her jock boyfriend in the woods. Clothes stay on for the most part, but she rubs one out and scores the first come of the camp. Of course, her shudders are followed with engulfing his large cock in her mouth. But honestly, she looks happy as a clam to do so. In fact, she demanded him to put his cock in her mouth and she followed up phenomenal deep throating and cock spitting.

Debbie gets her voyeurism on when her co-workers break into spontaneous sex at the dining hall. She’s not left on the tabletop touching herself doggie style for long — a full-blown threesome erupts with ice cubes to boot. In the end, Debbie and her nemesis end up on the field naked mud wrestling and making out because where would a cheerleading camp movie be without that hot mess?

The bonus features are only photo galleries, but this 2-hour movie will keep you entertained plenty.

Purchase “Debbie Does Dallas: The Revenge” DVD at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount.

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