My memoir is signed, sealed, delivered, and waiting for your eyes only. After experimenting with short story narration and podcasting, I’m excited to present this work as a book with a fresh story arch. If you’ve been a long time listener of the podcast, some of the stories will be familiar, but the journey is different. The book also details adventures that were never podcasted.

To further your intrigue and enticement, here is the book synopsis:

Mia Martina wasn’t going to sit around waiting for love to find her when her relationship ended. Instead, she went after it – in New York City’s erotic underground. Mia dove headfirst into the sex-party scene, swinging, spanking, and screwing her way out of heartbreak.

Follow her on an arousing and amusing journey as she tours the sex dens, women-only parties, and S & M dungeons that make up the city’s sexual landscape. By spending a year as a self-identified slut, she learns more about herself – and love – than she could have imagined.

Her wild tale is utterly relatable to even the sexually uninitiated. While at times sultry and steamy, her adventures will have you thinking twice about what role love, sex, commitment, monogamy, kink, and sexual fulfillment play in our modern lives.

Get your copy of “A Year of Sex – tales from New York City’s erotic underground” for the Nook and Kindle ereaders today. iBooks, pdf, and print copies available in the near future.

Please spread the “Year of Sex” word and if you are so inclined, post a review on Amazon or Barnes & Noble. Thanks for your support and happy reading.

xxMia

Much of the discussion centered on the pros and cons of creating work under pseudonyms. It seemed the general consensus was that people would like to not have two identities, but the reality of getting fired from one’s “real job” was far to great to risk. Pamela Madsen shared her story about getting fired from her job once her blog was revealed. She has since merged her identities, produced a book under her real name about her journey, sexual and otherwise, and gave it to her new employer essentially saying, “Read this and fire me if you want. I don’t want this coming out later.” She has remained employed.

It is stories like Ms. Madsen’s that can inspire more to come out. Much can be gained by sex bloggers creating work under their real name. Then the fill in the blank phrase about marginalization could be, “I have a friend who is a: sex blogger, sex worker, in an open marriage, into kink, etc.” With any movement, visibility breeds change. I applaud those who are able to come out from the pseudonym and merge identities and those who never even took up an alias in the first place. As for me, I like having two identities.

Listeners of my podcast might be surprised to know that I am actually a private person. Often I am asked why I would write and record about my sex life. Starting I Want Your Sex just seemed like a natural progression for me. Like most sex positive people, I was the friend that people turned to for relationship and sex advice. I accompanied many to sex shops to buy their first toy. Being open and honest is who I am. And I have strict separation about mixing the personal and professional.

In a work environment, I am not the one talking about all the sordid details of my weekend. For a long time many people I worked with did not even know I was in a relationship. I just don’t bring my personal life to work. If I got drunk, had a fight, or great sex with my partner, you are not going to hear me talking about it at the water cooler. Because I like the separation, it made sense that I would create a podcast under another name. Call me crazy, but it is preferable to me that those I work with do not know how I like to get fucked. Obvious concerns about safety were an issue too. But also having a nomdeplume is cool.

As a kid, I thought it was the coolest thing ever that the author of Silas Marner was a woman and George Elliot was a pseudonym. Granted the fact that George Elliot and, more recently, J.K. Rowling write under masculine or disguised feminine names is more of a comment on how our culture sees gender, but still I like the use of a pen name.

I didn’t remember my middle school desire to have an alias until a year into producing content as Mia. “Well, there you have it,” I said to my thirteen-year-old self with a big grin. “You got your wish.”

In honor of National Coming Out Day, I acknowledge that I do not feel closeted by my pen name. All those close to me know of my smut writing and I even told my previous employer about the ‘cast. I am open with my family about all aspects of my life including my non-monogamous relationship. They celebrate my struggles and victories and they are proud that I call myself a writer because they are writers as well. One day I hope to share some of my work with them. But for now I like to keep the separation with the knowledge that they can’t Google my alias and discover the dirty secrets that I make public.

For now, I will keep two names because I like it. Whether under a pseudonym or not, I will always speak honestly and openly about sex. I started the podcast because I wanted to give people a window into the sex party world and I hoped to inspire others to be sexually open and exploratory, whatever that means for them. I aim to continue doing just that.

This week kicks off a new reading series I am doing with fellow smut writers, Sadie Smythe, Rosie Q, and Julie Gillis.

I feel very fortunate to have connected with these ladies so quickly after my move to Austin. We are pioneering the untapped Austin erotica market. I see this venture as a new experiment and opportunity to forge new beginnings and to create an environment that will spark discussion about sexuality. I hope all those attending will be entertained, aroused, and ready to come back the following month. Aside from the four of us reading, entertainment will be provided by the Dumb Bondage Clowns. See our website for more details.

If you are in the Austin area, please come by. Otherwise, just help to spread the BedPost Confessions word.

Details:
When — Thursday September 9th and continuing on every 2nd Thursday of the month.
Where — The United States Art Authority (ext to the Spider House), 2906 Fruth Street Austin, TX 78705
Time — 8-10pm
Cost — Free!

Our website here.
Facebook page here.

Freedom of Fetish Episode 14.0

What is an open relationship? How do you know if you want one? How can you be most successful in one?

Learn the basics on how to communicate your needs and how to be open to the needs of your partner. I will discuss the myths surrounding open relationships (“doesn’t that mean you can cheat and get away with it?”) as well as strategies for successful open relationships. I will share from her personal experiences of experimenting with different types of non-monogamy as well as her professional researching and writing.

This class is appropriate to people who are just considering an open relationship, couples already in one, and singles looking to swing with a couple. You will learn about what makes a relationship open, the varying types of open relationships, the questions to ask yourself and your partner(s), and the tools to maintain a loving relationship.

Bring an open mind. You will be surprised by what you discover.