Beauty on the rocks by I-V-S

Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. If you like what you see and want more of it be sure to follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.

Did you miss Pleasurists #126? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #128? Be sure to read the submission guidelines and then use the submission form to submit before Sunday May 1st @ 11:59pm Pacific.

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• Giveaway: Trust Massage Oil Deadline: May 1st.
• Groovy Chick Giveaway! Deadline: May 6th @ Noon Central.
• Suede Fantasy Kit Giveaway Deadline: May 6th.
• Pub Crawl Passport Deadline: May 10th.
• Somewhere Over the Rainbow is a LGBTQI Pride-Inspired Dildo Just for You! Deadline: May 25th @ 11am Central.
• Coochy Shave Gift Pack Giveaway Deadline: May 31st.
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• Crystal Causes $12,000 sex toy giveaway & community fundraiser Deadline: July 31st.

Editor
Scarlet Lotus

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

• Eroscillator by the bedroom blogger
• Jopen Vanity Vr5 by Kaijah
• Icicles No. 16 by Mistress Kay
• Foreplay Ice by Angel deSanguine
• Jopen Vanity Vr9 by Mistress Kay
• Pulsing Peter Rabbit by Bella
• Menage a Trois Triple Tongue Tickler by Sammi
• Fairy Pocket Mini by Lucid Obsession
• Jumbo 11inch Massager by Mr. Marvelous
• We Vibe Tango by Lucid Obsession
• Happy Angel by Kit O’Connel
• Lucky 13 by Bella
• Petite Couture Patina by LucyLemonade

Dildos

• Bad Dragon Karabos by True Pleasures
• Tantus G-Force by Mistress Kay
• Jackhammer Jesus by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• njoy Pure Wand by Steve
• Tantus Mikey O2 by Toys in Love

Anal Toys

• Aneros Vice by Jake Holden
• Sasha Grey Signature Plug by Pixel Kitten
• Fun Factory Duke by Toys in Love
• Pop Plug by Kate

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

• Sliquid Sea by Bzzingbee
• Sliquid Swirl Cherry Vanilla by Lithaewyn
• LELO Personal Moisturizer by buzzvibe
• Blossom Organics Revitalizing Breast Exam Cream by True Pleasures
• LELO Flickering Touch Massage Oil by Kate

BDSM/Fetish

• Bad Kitty Collar by Lucid Obsession

Adult Books/Games

• Healing Sex by Kitty Stroker
• XXXopoly by Mistress Kay
• Pub Crawl Passport by Lucid Obsession
• SexSmarts by Lucid Obsession
• Cosmo’s Guide to Red-Hot Sex by Mistress Kay

Adult DVDs & Porn

• Gush: The Official Guide to the G-Spot and Female Ejaculation by Kate
• Girls Desired by Mia Martina
• Femme Core by The Porn Librarian
• Orgy of the Dolls by J.D. Bauchery
• Sex and Submission 28 by Ginger Leigh
• Minute Man 32 – Hold Tight by The Porn Librarian
• Tristan Taormino’s Rough Sex 3: Adrianna’s Dangerous Mind by J.D. Bauchery

Lingerie

• Peepshow Princess Panties by Red Vinyl Kitty
• Mint Shimapan Panty & Half Top Set by True Pleasures
• Double Agent by Red Vinyl Kitty
• Plus Size Leopard Print Mesh Camisole Set by silverdrop
• Pink Mesh Zebra Teddy by Red Vinyl Kitty

Miscellaneous

• Stormy Leather La Femme by Toys in Love
• Wand Controller by Red

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Girls Desired opens with Abby Winter models and production team prepping Larissa and Keilyn for a sex blind date. Larissa and Keilyn have not been told anything about one another, in hopes that the anticipation and tension will make for an explosive introduction. For 20 minutes both ladies are interviewed while they get ready. “What color eyes do you like? Who do you think it will be?” the producers question.

I was a little bored at all the blind date squawking, but the reveal was worth the build up. A shy entrance by Keilyn quickly shifts into open mouth kisses, giggles, and hugs. From there the ladies become intimate with each other’s lady parts and give each other a quick O right out of the gate. Politely and passionately, they each take turns using mouths, fingers, and other surprising body parts to get each other off. The eye contact of Larissa as she simultaneously sucks and finger fucks Keilyn is endearingly cute. And one might assume that the wearer of hot pink finger nail polish would not be a lover of lesbian sex, but Keilyn moves her fingers with the knowledge and fervor.

What surprised me about watching Larissa and Keilyn is how little they talk to one another and, yet, how naturally they move into varying positions. I was so drawn into the sex bubble Larissa and Keilyn created. By the end of the hour and fifteen minutes, I was completely crushed out on both and grateful that Larissa is in the second scene.

Larissa and Cleo met at a café where naughty antics develop over crème pie. Their making out began against graffiti marked alleyways and move into a bohemian styled bedroom. The sex and orgasms so real between the two that I felt like I came with them. Oh right. That’s because I did. Many, many times. Red kneed, flushed cheeks, and pulling hair from your mouth—I have been there—and I love watching girls get there.

Having reviewed one other Abby Winters porn, I admit I am becoming a fan. After seeing too much mainstream porn where it is all about hard fucking and cum shots, it is refreshing to watch sex that is genuine. I highly recommend Girls Desired, a 2008 AVN winner of Best Amateur video.

Get your copy of Girls Desired from www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount, plus all the free goodies mentioned earlier.

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One continuously replayed moment in porn for me, was a woman taking off her bra. Her breasts were naturally large and jiggled as she moved. She did not perform or exaggerate the removal of her clothing; it was a task that she did countless times in her life without much thought. Maybe the moment was so enjoyable to me because the taking off of her bra was not performed. The act was naturally done and therefore when she stood naked seconds later, I saw her as more vulnerable than before.

Performance, of course, can be titillating. My favorite kind of porn performance is striptease. Strip clubs are generally thought of as male spaces, but I have found many of the dancers love to perform for females. A striptease is most arousing for me when the dancer is so into her performance that I am pulled into her world.

What gets me off creatively tends to get me off sexually as well. I have had the experience of being charged creatively and sexually while watching a few exotic dancers who impressed and inspired me with their routines that were sexually charged, psychically challenging, and told a story. I have also been flushed with a wet spot in my brain and in between my legs with live modern dance, podcasts, books, and most recently Tumblr blogs.

Tumblr blogs are quick snippets into people’s world. Many of the ones I enjoy mix quotes about sex and sexuality with images of hard-core fucking, sensuality, and soft sexiness. The curation of these images and words takes me on a journey where I can easily scroll and pause on what makes feel electrified. Like this image from Patricia Yague’s Let Me In.

What is the story here? How long has she been waiting to have his cock by her face? My imagination wanders thinking about their story and all the naughty things they do to each other.

Or my libido might be driven by the tenderness captured in this moment from the Fuck Yeah Dykes blog. Instead of making up a story about the people in the photograph, I am reminded of my stories behind doorstep kisses.

Or this quote found on a February 5th, 2011 post on the Sex Is Not The Enemy blog:

“The more I explore sexuality and sex-positivity, the more I realize that there’s just as much judgment in the statement “sex is wonderful” as there is in “sex is awful.” It’s just as problematic to say “anal sex is amazing” as “anal sex is terrible.” That’s because sex is too big to fit into one adjective. Sex is both amazing and awful, depending on the situation you’re talking about. Sometimes, anal sex is amazing, at least for some people. And sometimes, it’s awful, again, at least for some people. There’s no sexual act that is always X or Y.”

- Sex-Positivity and Asexuality: Bringing Them Together | Charlie Glickman

I may have already seen this quote Charlie Glickman’s website, or I may have missed it. But regardless, it is the context of reading this quote about sex among images of sex that sparks my lady porn bits.

I really enjoy the curation of the Sex Is Not The Enemy blog for its inclusion of non-normative body types, body grooming, and pairing. Sometimes, the image we never thought would do it for us does. And this is why I turn to Tumblr blogs for my ladyporn. Unlike visiting most porn sites where pairings and acts are neatly categorized, with Tumblr blogs you are viewing the titillating and thought provoking images selected by someone else. I have no idea what I will see when I hit the next button, but I know if I don’t like it, I can quickly move on to another image. I also have little or no information on the person behind the blog, which makes me feel like I am a voyeur on a voyeur.

My porn needs can be so finicky (I’d like a sliver of authenticity, a moment of tenderness, a mention of the rough stuff, an image of this, and a close up of that) and surfing Tumblr blogs offer me continuous variety of images, motion, and words that peak my curiosity and spark my sexuality.

Thanks, Rabbit White for starting a conversation on porn and masturbation. Find out more about #ladypornday.

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“Pulp Fiction” by Quentin Tarantino is a classic movie offering up many parody opportunities that, unfortunately, “Pulp Friction” falls short of. The opening scene shows two gun-toting schoolgirls who swap weapons for sex with the man they were supposed to kill. I love a sweet ass exposed in a plaid skirt and the sex between the three has its moments, but where are my Pumpkin and Honey Bunny, and who are these schoolgirls?

Of all the six scenes, the only one that somewhat mirrors the original flick is the third scene with Ava Rose and Evan Stone. Ava Rose aka Ruby (Mia Wallace) wakes up from an overdose of the drug poignantly called “sex spell” and coyly asks Evan Stone aka Joe (Vincent Vega), “Can you eat me from top to bottom?” Evan Stone calls for reinforcements on the predicament of his boss’s wife asking him for sex and The Wolfe’s advice, of course, is to fuck the spell out of Ruby. Ava Rose and Evan Stone fuck like rock stars in a far less glamorous setting than the original Pulp Fiction set. Ava Rose is rather bendy – she’s a yogi, no doubt. The sex is raw, sweaty, hard fuck filled, and definitely worth the watch.

If you’ve been reading my porn reviews then you know that I love a good porn parody. I love the mix of pop culture humor to wash down all the cum-in-the-face shots. To my dismay, “Pulp Friction” did not deliver. The storylines were too far from the original creation and the sex in most scenes too run off the mill.

I would take a pass on this porn parody and instead pick up my favorite one “The Office: A XXX Parody” from www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount, plus all the free goodies mentioned earlier.

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Abbywinters.com porn photos continuously crop up on Tumblr pages and I have been intrigued by the site that boasts to have unscripted, undirected, and all natural women actually getting each other off. Watching “Girls Arching For Girls,” an abbywinters.com production, shows you benefits of subscribing to the porn site.

Most women don’t like porn because it seems fake, routine, and even if the lady is enjoying it, she inevitable ends up with cum on her face. “Girls Aching For Girls” is a refreshing change of pace with models sporting little or no makeup, non-toned bellies, pubic hair stubble, and contorted orgasm faces. In other words, they are not actors.

Watching this porn, I felt like a peeping tom viewing my neighbors having a long romp after Sunday brunch. Annabelle Lee and Joannie try just about every position on an overstuffed red leather chair. These ladies know their way around a pussy and they like to get each other off. I lost track of how many orgasms they each had. In fact, so did the director who asked the ladies questions about their 40 minutes of sexing. I couldn’t understand all that the bubbly Aussies had to say about having sex on camera, but I did get the orgasm count (you will have to watch to find out the answer) and how each woman’s lady bits felt to the other when she came.

Chloe and Jilly have a sweet lovemaking session bedside complete with out of breath check in breaks. Like Annabelle Lee and Joannie, these ladies are all natural, pleasing each other with tongues, fingers, and leg scissoring. The after interviews are a sweet touch to the production, especially when a naked surprise visitor stops by.

“Girls Arching For Girls” makes a great Valentine’s gift especially for those who are into amateur porn, lesbian sex, real sex, and for those who have been previously turned off by porn because of the fakeness and lack of female orgasms. Purchase “Girls Arching For Girls” from now until February 14th at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount, plus all the free goodies mentioned earlier.

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Based off of the 1970’s “porn chic” movie “Deep Throat,” “Throat: A Cautionary Tale” is a dark “porn noir” feature. And what a feature it is — winner of 5 AVN Awards including Best Oral Sex Scene, Best Screenplay, and Best Supporting Actress: Penny Flame. If you are unfamiliar with the original “Deep Throat” the premise is based on one women’s discovery that her clit is placed at the back of her throat enabling her to give great head and pleasure herself at the same time.

Sasha Grey plays Julie, the woman with the talent many men wish more women had. Julie works as a peep show girl, is in a bad relationship, and is sexually frustrated. As she intones over footage of her deep throating a very large dildo, “My pussy was always my enemy. It never gave me what everyone else had. My girlfriends would talk about masturbating and I tried. But it never happened for me…..I was ashamed of myself. Then I found it in my throat.”

Make no mistake about it Sasha Grey can deep throat and look like it is all her pleasure: spit, slobber, gagging, tears, and all. That is until her bad boyfriend makes her talent a cash cow. The movie is incredibly plot driven with flashbacks on Julie’s time as a sex worker and present day shots on those trying to solve Julie’s murder. Yes, this is murder mystery porn — something that I found a little too dark for me. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth the watch.

“Throat: A Cautionary Tale” is 2 hours long with 1 hour of bonus feature footage. The sex scenes runs the usually gamut, with blowjobs and facial shots being the main focus. If that is your bag and/or you think Sasha Grey is a fox, you will defiantly want to pick up this skin flick.

Purchase “Throat: A Cautionary Tale” DVD at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount.

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Growing up, Bewitched was one of my favorite shows to watch on the Nickelodeon. I loved Daren posturing over Samantha’s witchcraft. One can only imagine the stunts Samantha and her witchy family pull when the sweet 1960’s TV series gets a dirty twist.

“Not Bewitched XXX” is a lengthy porn with solid interludes between sex scenes. The plot centers on Aunt Clara (Eva Angelina) turning 1-year-old Tabitha (Teagan) into her future 18-year-old self — hot bod, sex kitten, and all. When Clara can’t undo the spell, Tabitha lingers in her future person long enough to discover sex. Tabitha’s sexual self-discovery begins when she politely excuses herself from the group to have a nap. But who could rest after a spell like that? With the curiosity and intrigue of a child, Tabitha gropes and provokes her adult body. I definitely recommend this AVN award-winning scene if you are into age place.

Also, if you have a thing for chicks in white Go-Go dancer boots this is your flick. Tabitha keeps her white boots on throughout her masturbation sequence. And Sasha Grey makes a white boot appearance on Darren’s desktop with her male cohort (Aaron Wilcoxxx). Best lines muttered from Sasha’s smoldering lips, “Take your fucking shirt off. Right now. That’s it.” Sasha Grey: desktop, reverse cowgirl, donning only white go-go boots, small tits bouncing, and dirty talking except when she is deep throating. Can we say replay. Male case study and I have watched this scene over and over again. Meow.

Falling not too far behind in my favorites is the sex scene between Tabitha (Jenna Haze) and Darren (Mike Horner). The husband and wife duo don’t stay wholesome for long. Jenna Haze coos at her man like a good wife saying things like, “Just like that. Yes.”

Other highlights include Nina Hartley as Samantha’s mother who magically appears in scenes at her whim and spouts off her opinion, just like in the TV show. Also, Ron Jeremy plays a genie that oversees an orgy of eight women. The women are in a free for all that occasionally becomes choreographed in oral sex circles and the like. Ron Jeremy and another women hold court, looking over the debauchery and touching themselves with abandon.

“Not Bewitched XXX” napped AVN’s 2009 award for Best Sex Comedy which is fitting considering the attention to detail in plot, character, costumes, makeup, and theatrics, including the dubbed in canned laughter. Including bonus features, this DVD boasts to have 5 hours of footage. The movie itself is 2 hours and 22 minutes, which is plenty of time to have a laugh, a wank, and a fuck, select your favorite scenes and repeat. At least, that is what the male case study and I did.

Purchase “Not Bewitched XXX” DVD at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount.

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The male case study and I are on a Sasha Grey kick. That coupled with a new Blu-ray player made for a fun night of home entertainment.

“Sun Goddess: Malibu” is the prom photo shoot of porn not in the cheesy backdrop sense, but in the “I’m going to bring my A game” sense. The production is shot entirely outside, with extensive and quality lighting, and varied pan shots with a camera boom. The high definition quality of Blu-ray means no stone was left untouched; not a boob job scar or ingrown pubic hair bump spotted.

The flick opens with Teagan Presley clad in a string bikini against a bright blue and smoke puff-clouded sky. The camera pans from overhead to skim her tanned and taunt body, making the viewer feel like you could just reach out and touch her. Her striptease, which includes covering herself with water, becomes slightly awkward when the dubbed in music stops.

Each of the 4 stars, Teagan Presley, Sasha Grey, Gianna Lynn, and Bree Olsen, have a 12 minute solo spot centered around a strip tease, a show and touch of genitalia, and dildo play. Subbing in for the facial shot, each scene ends with coy dildo licking. Teagan Presley’s licking includes, in my opinion, the unfortunate, “ass to mouth,” a skill she touts in the behind the scenes footage.

The AVN Awarding winning porn not only won for Best Solo Sex, but also Best All Girl Group Sex Scene. And what a scene it was. For 43 minutes, the ladies romp poolside for an evening filled with ass slapping, French kissing, carpet munching, dildo fucking, dirty mouth talking, strap on wearing, titty bouncing, clit rubbing, partner swapping fun filled times.

Sasha Grey is the only one without breast implants or a spray tan and that makes me like her even more. Her solo sex scene standing against a tree does not disappoint. Sasha has mastered the “come hither” look and she quietly mutters, “fuck” as she pleasures herself. It’s her naturalism in the act that gets the male case study and I every time.

Check out “Sun Goddess: Malibu” for the storyline free, artfully crafted pan shots of hot bodies, women pleasing themselves and each other action. If you like your porn sexy lesbian then order this one up.

Purchase “Sun Goddess: Malibu” DVD at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount.

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This installment of the Debbie series revolves around a rag tag group at spring break camp. Debbie (Sunrise Adams) is the cheerleading captain from the poor side of town and her spoiled rich teammates like to give her a hard time, be her best friend, and order her around. It’s all very confusing, just like in high school.

The interludes are long with some campy acting and pretty unfortunate fashion styling. The ladies cheer in rather conservative uniforms and the hot little bod of Sunrise Adams gets covered up in sweat suits five times her size. The baggy duds don’t stay on for long, of course, but still the sexy wearing-my-boyfriend’s-clothes is taken to an unsexy extreme in this skin flick.

Some highlights from the interludes are “The Man Show” inspired with naked jumping jacks, jogging without bras, and many rounds of spin the bottle.

The smut scenes are masturbation heavy, which is fitting for the camp backdrop. The sex is rather tame, but honest. Sunrise Adams eats a pussy like she actually enjoys the trip downtown. And female domination can be read into the not one, but two, scenes of a woman sitting on a man’s face.

Female empowerment can also be found in the opening scene when a woman gives a show for her jock boyfriend in the woods. Clothes stay on for the most part, but she rubs one out and scores the first come of the camp. Of course, her shudders are followed with engulfing his large cock in her mouth. But honestly, she looks happy as a clam to do so. In fact, she demanded him to put his cock in her mouth and she followed up phenomenal deep throating and cock spitting.

Debbie gets her voyeurism on when her co-workers break into spontaneous sex at the dining hall. She’s not left on the tabletop touching herself doggie style for long — a full-blown threesome erupts with ice cubes to boot. In the end, Debbie and her nemesis end up on the field naked mud wrestling and making out because where would a cheerleading camp movie be without that hot mess?

The bonus features are only photo galleries, but this 2-hour movie will keep you entertained plenty.

Purchase “Debbie Does Dallas: The Revenge” DVD at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount.

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This and other fun items can be purchased from www.adamandeve.com.

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The Masseuse could easily be renamed “How Creepy Guys Become Stalkers” because as much as the storyline is about a masseuse experimenting with giving “happy endings,” the plot more heavily revolves around a socially awkward virgin with bondage fantasies. America’s porn sweetheart, Jenna Jameson, plays Barbara the masseuse and Justin Sterling plays creepy guy Jim. Interesting note, Jenna Jameson and Justin Sterling were married during the making of this porn.

Shot on 35mm, the director shoots nice sunlight backed shots and tries to make this more of a movie than typical porn. Movie, it might be, but slow going and with horrible editing it is. The splicing between sex positions, characters, and plot lines becomes laughable at some points. What begins as an evening bathroom bondage girl on girl show for Jim ends with a morning strap on fuck fest with Justin nowhere to be found. In the morning when Jim walks in on Barbara and friend, Barbara says, “This is Helen.” Why an introduction had not been made hours and hours before it is unclear.

But that is the charm of porn — laughable scenarios and bad acting. What makes this one worth it is the rope bondage scene between Jim and Barbara. The chemistry between the two is palpable. When Jim commands Barbara to “spread your legs” one can sense how much his authority turns her on. They are no longer Jim and Barbara; they are Jenna and Justin, a couple very much in love who adore pleasing one another.

Jenna looks to-die-for naked except for black collar, black spike heels, and green rope laced through her collar and around her entire body. With a metal dental mouth gag keeping Jenna’s mouth a gapping hole, Justin teases Jenna with an assortment of props including a flogger and glass dildo. The scene is hot, hot, hot and well worth the purchase. Also, worth watching are the hand and blowjobs Jenna gives Justin. These scenes were used in a blowjob class I took at Babeland on how to give good head.

The rest of the flick is pure entertainment. Watch the Masseuse remake with Jenna Jameson and the original from the 80’s (included in the DVD) when you want a laugh with your friends. Watch the sex parts with Jenna Jameson and Justin Sterling when you want to get turned on.

Purchase “Jenna Jameson Is The Masseuse” at www.adamandeve.com/miaontop and receive a 50% discount.

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Because I enjoyed the first parody so much, I had to check out the sequel and it did not let me down. Returning to this genius parody is Ashlynn Brooke (Michelle), Gianna Michaels (Candy), James Deen (Jimmy) and Dane Cross (Dwayne). Joining the crew is Sadie West (Sam), Nika Noir (Kylie), Jenny Hendricks (Kara), Randy Spears (Reed), Mr. Marcus (Stan), and Dino Bravo (Dave). The premise and interludes had me laughing just like the first one.

When Michelle is called to headquarters for her yearly review, she fears getting a corporate whip lashing. So she makes a video to demonstrate her dedication to employee happiness at Dinder Muffin. Here are the highlights:

Monday, Candy and Stan: inter-racial hard and fast fucking, serious deep throating, she’s a laugher and likes to bounce. Watching her naturally large boobs make fast and furious circles made my clit skip a beat.
Tuesday, Sam and Jimmy: It’s all about her pleasure in this one: clit rubbing, ass rimming, head giving, she’s a panter, and not a faker. Seeing her orgasm is one of the hottest things I have ever seen. It’s not one of those “did she come?” guessing games. He works for her pleasure and she climaxes more than once.
Wednesday, Kylie and Reed: multi-tasking a blowjob and rubbing one out for herself.
Thursday, Michelle and Dwyane: They coo and fuck and she fixes his nuts.
Friday, Kara and Dave: upside down face fucking with saliva a plenty, corona popping, and the 69. Everything after that is a bit of a bore.

In this weekly recap Monday and Tuesday were my favorite days. And there is more of Tuesdays vixen Sadie West in the bonus features. Hotness.

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